Saturday 11 April 2015

EARLY SPRING FEELS


Everything pretty ends up coming out in springtime. Daffodils appear at roadside, lambs are being born, the sun (sometimes) shines down on the world making everything glow. However, I can't help but be very sceptical about spring as a whole. 

Whenever spring comes around I have this weird feeling inside of me. It isn't necessarily 'happiness' either, but a constant gloom building up inside. Over the past few years, this feeling has become more intense and I have never found out the reason behind it. Maybe because it is the first season of the year, or the fact everything is beginning to change again- which I hate. I loathe change but sometimes it cannot be helped.

Don't get me wrong, I adore photographing what spring has to offer- like the daffodils springing up in the garden, or just little trinket bits that I find in the garden. Being back from uni for the spring break hasn't really helped my mood either I don't think. I love being home to see my family and friends, but ever since I moved to Manchester I feel like my heart and soul belong there.

Coming from a very country place, I never thought being in the city would be my cup of tea but I was entirely wrong on this perspective. I crave the city when I am back at home, and the atmosphere it has to offer. I used to be such a home bird, and before I moved to Manchester for uni I never thought I would last being in the big wide world all on my own, but I love it. I love having that piece of independence inside of me and waking up to the noises of the city everyday. I adore the people I live with, and I thank the high heavens that I was placed with them in my halls, because they really are great and amazing people. I love them with all of my heart.

I do love my friends from back at home too though. They have been with the through school and sixth form, and I couldn't have asked for a better bunch of people to help me grow into myself, and find who I really am. They have shaped me to become the person I am today. This may be good and bad in some senses, but I do thank them a lot. Seeing them over the easter break has made my heart swell that little bit more, and made me realise how much I miss them when I am in the city. 

This time of year makes me reflect on life. I decide which the good aspects of life are at the moment, and I also dwell on the bad aspects. It cannot be helped, but I try and keep myself busy so that I do not dwell on the bad too much. Venting over my blog helps me to realise how much I have going for me, and how much room I have for improvements in my life.

I associate spring with the word 'new'. This could be because it is a new season, a fresh season and to some a happy season and a chance to look at the upcoming year and, and wait and see what it has to offer. I just do not pay much attention to this season and I cannot wait until summer arrives. This could be because of the opportunities I have planned out, but also because this brewing gloom inside of me will eventually disappear. 

I am sorry for such a low blog post today, but venting clears that little piece of my brain associated with darkness for a while, and helps me focus on the happy parts that I have to look forward to. 


On a happier note, meet Tyler my brothers new rabbit. Our old rabbit, Stardust, died from old age. He was 12 (in human years!) so he lasted quite a long time. Tyler is a baby which brings along his mischievous side. He is a very funny rabbit though and the whole family love him to pieces. Bringing Tyler into the family also brought happiness and something for the family to focus on. My brother also adores him and thinks the world of him, which is the most important thing. 

Again, I am sorry for such a sad post today but now that is out of the way I can focus on more uplifting posts for you all!

How has your easter break been so far?

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